Turn Me On, Dammit

US release date: March 30

A healthy girl, with a healthy sexual appetite, and some wild sexual fantasies. Do you see any problem in that? It only becomes a problem when everybody calls her a pervert. Well yes, maybe she is, but is it really a problem?

My Rating: 7/10


Mirror Mirror

US release date: March 30

Tarsem movies are always about freak artsy-fartsy costumes and set designs, so take it or leave it, and let’s just focus on the content. In this film he already tone down much. The economic animated prologue is surely way below his usual standards. And comedy. Now that is new. No wonder the movie fails quite miserably in that department. Maybe something like the Kristen Stewart’s version is more suitable for Tarsem, but now we’ll never know.

My Rating: 4/10

Ministry: ‘Relapse’

Release date: March 27

01. Ghouldiggers
02. Double Tap
03. FreeFall
04. Kleptocracy
05. United Forces
06. 99 Percenters
07. Relapse
08. Weekend Warrior
09. Git Up Get Out N Vote
10. Bloodlust

My favorite tune: United Forces

Al Jourgensen’s always punishing music are more and more into ‘positive’ messages these days, but his near-singleminded bashing on scum lawyers and crooked agents sometimes can really get in the way. That’s your own problem, Al, not exactly a ’99 percenters’ thing.

My Rating: 5/10

The All-American Rejects: ‘Kids In The Street’

Release date: March 27

01. Somebody’s Gone
02. Beekeeper’s Daughter
03. Fast And Slow
04. Heartbeat Slowing Down
05. Walk Over Me
06. Out The Door
07. Kids In The Street
08. Bleed Into Your Mind
09. Gonzo
10. Affection
11. I For You

My favorite tune: Heartbeat Slowing Down

How far AAR can stretch their emo-poprock genre? Without any viable new musical influences and fresh directions, other than adding more and more today’s-supercommon techno synth sounds, their best result is a new album so lacking of strong potential hitmakers.

My Rating: 5/10

The Raid: Redemption

2012 Dublin International Film Festival – Winners Audience Award, Dublin Film Critics Award Best Film.
2011 Toronto International Film Festival – Winner People’s Choice Award Midnight Madness.

US release date: March 23

Let’s throw our brains aside for a while and just try to gobble and enjoy the, well, not so nonstop violent actions… and… it still doesn’t work.
Why? Because we still have our visual and audial logic.
If we see an apple falls from its tree, we automatically expect it would go down, without even thinking. If it suddenly floats up, we reflexively know something has to be very wrong.
If we hear something barks, we will assume it to be a dog. Not a cat.
If somebody shooting at you from behind a door, then you open the door, you will assume to see at least one gunman, not people wielding big knives. If three machete-wielding vicious thugs charging at you simultaneously, you won’t have time to deal with them one on one. They won’t take turn to slash you into pieces.
Why two unrelated characters at two separate rooms suddenly speak similar dialogues, using verbatim same term?
Something has to be very wrong. And we still don’t have to do any thinking.
So, yes we can make a film full of brainless characters, and there sure is no rule against requiring your audiences to shut off their brains to enjoy it. But every movie at least still does require its director’s brain. This movie requires your brain, Mr. Evans.

My Rating: 4/10

7 Hati 7 Cinta 7 Wanita (2011)

All men are losers, or crazy, or both. Fine. But are there really seven women? I’ve counted at least nine, even ten? Nurses not included. Oh okay, let’s discount the MDs. But now we have eight? Okay, primary patients only? Oh no, now we only have six!
If we want people to take sexual abuse and gender equality topic much seriously as they should, we can’t rely on a film that frames the subjects as a shallow mellow afternoon drama. Even by some hazy-dazy old-time Indonesian cinema standard, the in-movie songs are just bone chilling terrible. And a chinese guy named Acin? Are you kidding?

My Rating: 2/10

Kentut (2011)

A series of shouted comical overacts, scripted products placements, political-social overparodies, and one lip-synched song. It is supposed to be a clever satire by pretending to be stupid. Kind of makes you wonder why the filmmaker even have to take such an elaborate indirect approach to deliver a blank shot.

My Rating: 3/10